As everyone knows, Al Gore's advisers are trying desperately to dream up ways to distinguish their man from his boss. One obvious way to do that, you might think, is to highlight Al Gore's experience in the real world. Bill Clinton seems to have been born a professional politician. According to reliable biographers, "Good to see you -- thanks so much for your support" were the first words young Billy spoke from his highchair. Out of law school he went straight to his first (unsuccessful) run for public office. And once he had settled at the public trough -- excuse us, once he had entered public service -- he never voluntarily left. (The closest thing the president had to a real job was a quick fling as a prof at a state law school.)
By contrast, Al Gore at least tried, however briefly, to live a normal life before taking the plunge. As a soldier, then a newspaper reporter, this year's Democratic nominee had a chance to familiarize himself with the world the rest of us live in. So surely voters will reward him for his real-life experience, right?
Alas, the data are not promising. As a public service of its own, and in its continuing effort to shore up the Gore campaign, THE SCRAPBOOK leafed through the annual Gallup Poll that rates the public's esteem for various professions -- you know, the one that always shows car dealers finishing last. Of the 45 professions rated, newspaper reporters ranked at number 28. This may be surprisingly good for newspaper reporters (it puts them ahead of HMO managers, after all), but it's certainly not what a presidential candidate could hope for. Apparently, people respect newspaper reporters less than funeral directors -- less than dentists -- less, even, than governors, which is what Bill Clinton was for all those years, from the time he could shave. Still worse, when Gore changed professions and got elected to Congress, he descended to an even less popular profession: Congressmen come in 39th.
In fact, to judge by our researches, if Gore had really wanted to prepare himself for a successful campaign, he would have begun his professional life as a nurse who worked in a pharmacy and practiced veterinary medicine on the side. A degree in engineering would have been nice, too. Needless to say, this would have been yet another historic first.