The bad news is settling in -- starting to seem real. Some take this as a cue to leave, others to dance. But really: Somebody has to do something about this music. "It's Not Unusual" was bad enough. But now, just as the big-screen TVs announce another Republican defeat, the band cranks up to top volume and plays Kool and the Gang's "Celebration." If Republicans lose the House, they'll probably haul out "Ode to Joy." With a disco beat.
The effervescent Armstrong Williams suddenly returns to the stage, urging the crowd to persuade the media that "We're not dead." Finally, a Republican message for the new millennium: "We're Not Dead!"
Reported by the staff of THE WEEKLY STANDARD